Title: The Fall of the House of Winchester
Characters/Pairing: Sam/Dean, Ruby, Lilith, OCs, mentions of Castiel, Anna
Warnings: Wincest, swearing, character death
Spoilers: Major plot point spoiler for Season 4.
Word Count: 6,442
Disclaimer: Don't own - just playing in somebody else's sandbox.
Summary: Dean thinks Sam's slipping further and further away. What he doesn't know is that the Sam he knew has been gone for a long time and the new Sam doesn't just want Lilith's head on a platter.
A/N: Written for dreamlittleyo at sammessiah 's for the Anti-Christmas Fic Exchange. This ended up a bastardized mix of her general request and a tiny bit of one of the specific prompts. I hope that's still okay dreamlittleyo and that you still like it. Merry Anti-Christmas!
Sam watched Ruby pace back and forth in front of where he was seated on the hood of the latest car she had stolen.
She had driven them out to an abandoned farm just outside of town, the headlights of the Mustang revealing a half collapsed, lonely house precariously leaning towards the right partially concealed by waist high wild grass. The only witness to their middle of the night meeting, a fox that quickly scurried away from the car and into the tall grass almost before Sam even spotted it.
He hadn’t really been surprised when, instead of speaking, she had started to pace. Used to it, he had slid up onto the hood, prepared to outwait her. It turned out that he didn’t have to wait long.
“He’s getting too close Sam.” She hissed, shaking her head.
He snorted, “No, he’s not.”
She whirled and paced over to stand in front of him. “Sam! He told you that he believes that you’ll go dark.”
He shrugged nonchalantly and shifted until he was leaning back against the windshield and crossed his arms over his chest. “So?”
Ruby blinked and shook her head as if she was certain she hadn’t heard him right. “So? So? Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Ruby,” he sighed and leaned his head back so that he could stare up at the star filled sky. “Dean is not a problem okay. I’m his baby brother. He sold his soul for me. He’s not about to kill me.”
“He will if the Angels tell him too.”
Sam lifted his head slowly to stare back at her. “No he won’t.”
She rested her hands on his outstretched legs and leaned in. “You just don’t want to see it because of what you want.”
He lifted an eyebrow, “Jealous Ruby?” He sneered, “Not a good look on you.”
“Oh fuck you Sam!” She spat back, “Who’s been here all along for you? Who’s been the one to train you to get you ready to face Lilith? Who’s the one you’ve been fucking? Taking blood from? Who’s always believed in you?”
He burst out laughing, “You aren’t serious? Jesus Ruby don’t play the martyr with me. We both know that you’ve only done those things because of what’s in it for you.” He slid off the hood of the car and grabbed her arms.
“Do not push me Ruby. I have worked too long and too hard to get to this point.”
She pursed her lips and looked away.
He chuckled darkly, “Gonna sulk now?”
Ruby’s head snapped back and she glared up at him. “I’ve said it before and I’m saying it again. What you’re doing is a mistake.”
The only warning she got was his eyes narrowing before he violently shoved her away from him.
He smirked as she stumbled backwards, trying in vain to keep her footing before landing on her ass on the hard gravel of the driveway. Deliberately he kept his pace slow as he took the three steps to get to her side and crouched down. “Your misgivings are duly noted. Now are you going to drive me back to the motel or am I taking the car?”
“I’ll drive you.”
“So how’d the booty call go?” Dean muttered sarcastically and couldn’t help the smirk when Sam jerked against the motel room door he had just softly closed.
His brother spun around and first checked his empty bed before noticing him sitting in one of the two chairs in the corner of the room.
“What the hell are you doing up?”
His mind flashed back to the nightmare that had woke him. In it he had been back in that room with Alastair. Only this time the master torturer hadn’t managed to get free and Dean had continued to continue with his revenge, even after Alastair had told him exactly what Castiel had wanted to know. It had woken him up sweating, shaking and, to his utter shame, hard. Like hell was he going to tell his brother that though.
“Or were you working that mind of yours?” He sneered instead, “You know I’ve always wondered. When there isn’t a handy demon nearby, how exactly do you go about practicing? Make me happy and tell me that you throw Ruby around. I mean,” he shrugged carelessly. “She can take it after all. You know since she is a demon.”
Sam was off the door and had him dragged out of his chair before he could process the movement. “Jealous Dean?” He snarled low, “Prefer I practiced on you?”
Dean shoved his brother away from him and had to fight down the urge to take a swing at him. “Would you?”
His brother flicked his wrist and he found himself thrown back against the wall. He snarled as he tried to push away, images of exactly how badly he was going to beat his little brother, frightening but exciting at the same time but the thoughts froze as soon as he realised he was pinned.
“Let me go. Now Sam!” He snarled.
He smirked at him as he slowly walked closer. “I thought you wanted to help me practice.” He settled both hands on the wall on either side of his head.
“You son of a bitch!” He hissed, “I’m gonna beat your ass.”
He grinned and leaned closer until they were sharing the same air. “Yeah, I don’t think so.”
Dean narrowed his eyes and ground his teeth in silent frustration. If his brother wanted to play then he was on his own because there was no way he was going to take the bait.
“What Dean?” His faced shifted into a look of mock concern. “You know we have to stop Lilith from breaking the seals and the Angels apparently can’t stop her. I’m the only one that can because of what I can do.”
He couldn’t help himself, he was hard wired to protect his younger brother, but it was only since coming back from hell that he realised he was going to have to protect Sam from himself. “Sammy what you can do, it’s not safe. I’ve told you before, you’re walking on a very slippery slope.”
“I know, and it’s going to get darker and darker.” Sam grinned darkly at him and his eyes flashed yellow. “Just like I know it’s suddenly gotten darker for you hasn’t Dean?”
Dean swallowed hard and his mind whirled in confusion and just the tiniest bit of fear. Since that very first night after being released from the hospital after Alastair damn near choked him to death, the dreams of torturing the demon had started. But Sam couldn’t know that, he couldn’t read minds, at least Dean hoped he couldn’t. “Wha..what?”
He smirked, “It felt good didn’t it? Taking revenge on that bastard. Using what he forced you to learn by first hand experience and turn it around on him.”
He stared shaking his head, “I don’t…I don’t know…”
Sam gripped his chin in one hand and leaned forward until his breath was tickling the hair behind Dean’s ear. “You dream about it, I know you do. And I also know the memory, the thought of what you did to Alastair gets you hard.”
He clenched his eyes tightly shut and tried to tune out the sound of his brother’s voice. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He chuckled low and dirty. “Sure I do. You know I sometimes leave at night and I’ve come back to you moaning and talking softly about what you’re going to do to him, like he’s there in the room beside you while you rut against the bed.”
Oh God, oh God, oh God!
To his utter humiliation, he could feel himself getting hard again because of the duel stimulation of the memory and Sam’s hot breath in his ear. He had always known he was kind of fucked up but this went so far beyond that. He stomach rolled with nausea even as his blood began to heat with want.
“No. You’re wrong.” He forced past the lump in his throat.
His brother pulled back and grinned. “No I’m not.” He let his free hand fall from the wall to press against Dean’s half hard cock.
“Don’t!” He demanded but couldn’t stop the soft moan from slipping free as Sam gently squeezed him.
“It’s seems I’m not the only one on a slippery slope and between you and me I’m thinking you’re sliding a lot faster then I am.”
Dean tossed his head back and forth violently. “No I’m not! You’re wrong I don’t dream about torturing Alastair, I don’t! I have nightmares.”
Sam slowly started stroking him through the thin material of his boxers. “So tell me Dean, is it just the memories of Alastair that you see or do you dream of torturing other people hmmm? Maybe the asshole who cut us off in traffic a week ago? Or what about that waitress who wouldn’t succumb to your charms?”
“Stop.” He begged low, “Please Sam stop. You can’t, we’re brothers.”
“You like it.”
He did, God help him, he did. But that didn’t matter because it was Sam touching him, Sam slowly jerking him off and that was so many levels of wrong that he wasn’t even sure where to begin.
“I don’t. I don’t.”
He chuckled and backed away. “Okay Dean. If you say so.”
Dean felt the pressure of his brother’s power fall away from his body and had to lock his knees so that he didn’t collapse. He stayed where he was, his breathing short, sharp gasps and clenched his teeth to keep from the sudden urge to beg his brother to touch him again locked in his chest.
He watched him through leery eyes as his brother pulled his jacket and over-shirt off and let them drop to the floor. Before he settled on his bed and started unlacing his boots.
It seemed so surreal, watching Sam getting ready for bed like it was just another night for the brothers Winchester. And he could feel anger start to boil because of it.
Dean put up with a lot as far as he was concerned. He put up with Sam going against his wishes and continuing to use his demon powers. Put up with him running around with fucking Ruby but this was too much. He couldn’t do what he did, he couldn’t pin him to the wall with his fucking demon powers, torment him and molest him and then act like nothing had happened.
It was time his little brother remembered he was the little brother and that it was his duty to listen to his older brother.
He was off the wall, across the room and taking Sam off the edge of his bed.
“You son of a bitch!” He snarled as they collapsed in a heap between the two beds, Dean straddling Sam’s lap. He curled his hands into the fabric of his brother’s t-shirt and jerked his head and upper chest off the floor before slamming him back into it. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
Sam wrapped his hands around Dean’s wrists but other than that didn’t struggle. “What makes you think there’s something wrong with me?”
It wasn’t a conscious thought, just one second he was glaring down at his brother smirking up at him and then the next small tendrils of pain were snaking up his right arm and Sam was tonguing at the small spilt at the corner of his mouth. “Are you fucking kidding me? I’m your brother Sam, you don’t do shit like that with your family.”
He snorted, “You liked it.”
“No I didn’t!” He howled, ignoring the fact that he kind of did by focusing on keeping the urge to hit him again locked down tight.
“No? Funny I’m pretty sure it was your hard cock I was stroking.” He eyed him speculatively, “You pissed at me Dean? Wanna hit me again? Teach me a lesson?”
Even in the haze of his anger he could sense a trap but it didn’t stop him from responding. “I ought to. Maybe I could make you see some sense.”
“How Dean?” He purred back, “How do you wanna do it? Use your fists? Or maybe it would work better if you used your knife. Cut me up a little, watch me bleed.”
A shiver slid down his spine and it sickened him to realize he wasn’t certain if it was revulsion at the idea or excitement.
He had warned Castiel that if the Angel forced him to torture Alastair that what came out of the room after the deed was done wasn’t going to be the same Dean that had been pulled from the pit. Of course his warning hadn’t been heeded, the information that the head torturer of Hell was supposed to have was too important, the lives of Angels on the line.
But he had known that whatever part of him had been lost back in hell had been replaced by a decade of Alastair’s tutelage and that once that dark, twisting part of him was allowed even a moment’s breathing space it would be damn near impossible to shut it down again. And that had been even before he had gone into that room with Alastair.
And now it wanted a piece of Sam, was practically vibrating with anticipation at his little brother’s words.
“Come on Dean.” Sam purred and he thrusted up minutely. “Teach me my lesson, big brother.”
His hand clenched back into a fist and he growled low in his chest. Maybe that’s exactly what Sam needed. He’d already been considering it, a good beating. Maybe it wouldn’t get rid of the demon blood or the twisted desires but it would teach him to keep them under wraps. Just like he was keeping his under control.
Only, really, he wasn’t. Not when he was seriously considering hurting his brother, his little brother.
Dean shoved himself off of him and grabbed up his jeans from the floor at the foot of his bed. He hopped stepped into them and without bothering to do them up, grabbed his over-shirt, socks and boots.
“You can’t run from this.”
He didn’t bother to turn around, he didn’t want to look at Sam, see the smirk he could hear in his voice. Besides, he wasn’t running, he just needed some time on his own to pull his shit back together. Sam had thrown him, dragged him kicking and screaming from the comfort zone of his denial of the twisted shit hiding inside him and shoved it into the light. With the added bonus of forcing him to realize that he seemed to like the idea of fucking around with Sam.
He just needed space.
“Fuck you Sam.” He tossed over his shoulder and slammed out of the room.
The cold air on the bare skin of his arms and the even colder concrete under his feet felt like relief.
Taking a deep breath, Dean started across the parking lot towards the Impala. He wasn’t planning on going anywhere, half dreading, half hoping that Sam would call Ruby and his little demon whore would come running. If or when that happened, he had every intention of taking her down this time regardless if she had saved his little brother’s life while he was in hell or not. Because as far as he was concerned, all the problems with Sam, the using of his powers, the fucked up desires that suddenly seemed to have popped up out of nowhere were her fault. He just needed to get her out of the picture, permanently, and then things would start to go back to normal. They could be Dean and Sam Winchester again, friends, hunting partners and most importantly, brothers.
She was still riding the same women that she had been possessing the last time they had had a run in with her. Back when they had first found out that there was a prophet dedicated to their lives.
He stopped dead in his tracks, midway between the door to the room and the safety of the Impala, feeling foolish with his over-shirt, socks and boots in his hands being caught out by a demon.
He swallowed down the feeling and stifled the fear that had been lurking just beneath it. Yes Lilith scared him but not for the reasons that his brother thought. It had nothing to do with her being the most powerful demon that had yet to face off against, it wasn’t even the fact that he suspected that she still held the contract to his soul and could send her hounds after him at any time. It was what would happen if they failed to beat her. He had no illusions that he wouldn’t be going back to hell and the rack. Only this time he knew he wouldn’t be up on the rack very long, not with what lurked inside him now, and this time when he climbed down and picked up a blade there wouldn’t be any angel coming to intervene.
Dean managed a sneer, “Lilith.”
She smirked, “I’ve come at a bad time I see.” She shrugged, “Good.”
Before he could react, arms wrapped around him from behind and held him unnaturally tight against a putrid body. From the corner of his eye another demon seemed to materialize out of the darkness at his side. This one a bulky man, tattoos littering his bare arms and peaking out from the leather vest hugging his chest.
He smiled at Dean, showing gaps and broken teeth. “Night-night.”
Dean zeroed in on the fist coming towards his face, trying to gauge the exact moment to move so it clocked the demon holding him from behind. But just before he could snap his head to the side the noise of a door opening behind him and Sam’s outraged yell of his name distracted him.
The last thought before a bright flash of pain slammed into his jaw and darkness pulled him away was that it was worrying that he had heard anger and possessiveness in his brother’s voice but no fear. There should have been fear.
Sam didn’t bother getting up as he listened to his brother moving around the room. He knew what Dean was doing; years upon years of learning his big brother’s tells had alerted him to the slight widening of his eyes, the panic a bright flare. He knew he would make a break for the Impala, maybe a near-by bar because Sam had pushed too far but he’d be back. Dean always came back.
Still it annoyed him that he had let it go as far as it had. For months he had been pushing slowly, light touches when it wasn’t necessary, letting his eyes linger when he knew Dean could see him, pushing at the irrational anger and fear he had seen lurking in his eyes.
But then Ruby had to go and put him on edge and screw everything up.
He tongued at the small split at the corner of his mouth, the copper tang of his own blood coupled with the small bursts of pain setting off waves of pleasure. He groaned softly but ignored the aching of his dick.
He could call Ruby, take the edge off but he’d been depending on her a little too much recently, her little outburst proof of that mistake. The problem was that with her it had gotten too easy, he didn’t need to pretend that he was only trying to do good when he was using his powers, didn’t need to censor his words.
She knew that he had every intention of killing Lilith and ensuring that Lucifer stayed exactly where he was. Which granted, Dean knew that too, only his brother didn’t know it was because he was ready to control the Legion and with it, the world. God had Heaven, Lucifer had Hell, he wanted the middle ground. And at his side would be Dean, and he would be there willingly both as his second in command and in his bed.
The problem was that Ruby was temporarily occupying Dean’s space and she didn’t want to give it up. And the thing with the slippery little demon whore was that she would do whatever it took to stay exactly where she was.
He hadn’t been lying all those months ago when he told her that he didn’t trust her and nothing she had said or done made him want to change his mind. In fact, the more she pushed about Dean being a complication and a danger to him, the less he trusted her.
The single lamplight flickered.
“What the hell?” Sam hissed and pushed himself to his feet.
There was no way anything was in the room with him but that left outside where he knew his brother still was because he hadn’t heard the Impala’s trademark squeaky door or the roar of her engine.
“Ruby.” He growled and turned to the motel room door.
A month ago he wouldn’t have believed that she would be stupid enough to attack his brother while he was close-by. But that had been before Castiel had used Dean to torture Alastair and Sam had let it slip to her that he was pretty sure that it would work in his favour.
Dean had tortured souls for ten years and admitted that he liked it. That wasn’t something that could be buried forever and eventually it was going to start coming out in small ways. Sam had every intention of exploiting it more than before, especially after the first night he had caught his brother rutting against the bed while he muttered in his sleep about it but he had known it was a mistake to tell Ruby. She would know he was stepping up his game of pulling Dean to him and that was pretty much the exact moment that her misgivings had kicked up a notch.
He had planned on letting Dean have first crack at her once he accepted his roll at Sam’s side but if she was trying to pull a fast one on him then his brother was going to be out of luck because he was going to take her down now.
He threw open the door, prepared to see Ruby and Dean swinging at each other. What he wasn’t prepared for was Lilith standing on his brother’s right, a male demon, as tall as his brother, holding him pinned to him and a bigger male demon swinging at him.
Sam’s rage slammed into him, no one touched Dean, no one. Especially not some demon that had chosen the losing side.
In a split second, Lilith turned and flashed a mocking smile at him as his brother slumped in his captive arms before they simply disappeared.
Dean glared at Lilith through narrowed eyes as she got up from the chair across from him and moved to the window. He watched her move the dusty curtain back only far enough to peer out into the darkness.
He didn’t know how long he had been out but it couldn’t have been more than a couple hours before he was coming awake, tied to one of the two rickety, of what he could only guess was a room in an abandoned motel. At first he had simply been pissed off for being caught so easily but after learning, quickly, that if he tried to use Latin on her or the two flunkies that she had no compulsion against using her power to apply pressure to his heart and lungs, he had been livid.
That had been at least twenty or so hours before.
“Shouldn’t be long now.” She murmured gleefully and turned back to smirk at him, “By now the little traitor Ruby should have pinpointed where we are and dear Sammy should be on his way to rescue big brother.”
He sneered at her, “I don’t know why you’re bothering with a round three. You can’t beat him, so why don’t you just give up now? I’ll even go easy on you, do the shortest exorcism I know, promise.”
She chuckled as she sashayed back across the room and settled into the chair across from him. “Oh Dean didn’t Sammy tell you? I already know I’m not going to survive to see Lucifer rise.”
“So what?” He demanded, “Your demonic clock running out? Figured you’d try to go out in a blaze of glory by taking us with you?”
Lilith leaned forward, using the questionably stable table between them to rest her forearms on. “I though you and the Angels were all buddy buddy. Didn’t they tell you? Sixty-five seals have been broken,” She grinned at him, her white teeth bright in the gloom of only a half dozen candles lit around the room. “I’m number sixty-six.”
Dean was pretty sure his heart stopped and fine tremors started to snake across his body. Sam had been gunning for Lilith since before he had been dragged to hell and then with Ruby’s help, he had been learning how to control his demon powers to ensure that he could kill her. Castiel had said that he was the first seal; a righteous man spilling blood in hell but no one told him that Lilith was the last and that it was going to be his brother that broke it.
Though in hindsight he now understood why Castiel said that it would be Dean that had to ensure that the apocalypse would never happen. He had thought it was because he had been the first seal not because Sam was the one that was destined to break the last. The Angels obviously believed that he still held some sway over his brother.
The problem was, he didn’t, the night before evidence of that.
If he had then Sam would have stopped leaning how to control his powers when Dean had told him too. He wouldn’t have kept sneaking around behind his back, with Ruby, learning, controlling, and getting more powerful and less human by the day. He wouldn’t have done what he had done; he wouldn’t have touched Dean like a lover instead of a brother.
The problem was, if he was going to believe that Sam’s excuse was the demon blood then what was his, because as much as he’d rather not admit to it, even in the confines of his own head, he had enjoyed it.
So lost in his own thoughts, he didn’t notice Lilith standing up from her chair before going completely still beside him. In fact he didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary until the door banged open, with enough force to pull it half off the hinges, and almost all the candles blew out from the force of it.
He had been really hoping that it was going to be Castiel on the other side but really wasn’t surprised to see Sam. Generally the only luck Winchesters had was bad.
“Sammy.” She purred.
“Lilith.” He snarled back before flicking his wrist and sending her careening into the wall beside the table.
“Sam, Sammy don’t!” Dean yelled, hoping that maybe this time he could get through to his brother.
His eyes snapped between Lilith’s smirking face and Sam’s rage filled one.
“If you’re waiting for your minions to spring your trap, I’m afraid they’ll be delayed.” He stalked father into the room, until he was close enough to her that it reminded Dean of the night before. “Permanently.”
She laughed, carefree and unhurried. “Oh Sammy.”
“Sam don’t!” He pleaded, “She’s the last seal!”
His brother didn’t react at all to his words, it was like he didn’t ever realize that Dean was in the room, his eyes fixed on the demon pinned to the wall.
Dean tried pulling at his bond wrists, he needed to get free and stop his brother before it was too late.
Suddenly Ruby was at his side, “You live.” She muttered low, her disdain clear.
He was pretty sure that if she hadn’t been bending down and not so carefully sliding her knife between his wrist and the ropes that he never would have heard her.
He swallowed down his retort, hoping that if he stayed silent that she’d get him free faster. He needed to be free; he needed to get to Sam before all hell broke loose, literally.
“Think you’re strong enough boy king?”
Dean’s head shot up from where he had been keeping a close eye on the way Ruby was sawing through the rope, not stupid enough not to believe that if she got a second she wouldn’t “accidentally” slit his wrist. He caught Lilith’s smirk and Sam’s answering scowl.
“Oh I know I am.”
“Sam!” He yelled, hoping to get his brother’s attention.
“There.” Ruby muttered just as his right arm lifted from the chair.
“Fucking finally!” He snarled and used his sudden mobility to grab the knife from her. “Get my feet.”
“Oh by all means your highness.” She spat back sarcastically but surprisingly bent to do so.
He forced the tip of the knife under the rope wrapped around his left wrist, ignoring how it caught his skin and sliced deep enough to bleed. It didn’t matter; he wouldn’t bleed to death so it was unimportant, at least for now.
A gagging noise caught his attention. He looked up to see Sam’s eyes were yellow and his hand was raised, palm out, towards Lilith. It was her choking as she wreathed, pinned to the wall, and something like little sparks of red lighting danced up and down her body.
“No!” Dean jerked on the knife getting his other wrist free and then kicked out at Ruby to get away from his freed legs.
He jumped up from the chair, ignoring Ruby spitting curses at him and slid to a stop in front of his brother.
“Sam!” He grabbed his outstretched arm and tried to move it. “Sammy, God damnit stop!”
Suddenly Lilith went silent behind him and finally, finally, Sam blinked and looked down at him, his eyes once again their normal, warm, hazel.
Dean didn’t bother turning around, sure that if Lilith wasn’t threatening them then she was dead.
“What did you do?” He whispered, horrified and vaguely he wondered why the sky wasn’t splitting open and raining down fire. He was pretty sure that was in the Bible somewhere.
Sam shifted so that the arm he had had raised was now turned and he was cupping Dean’s cheek. “You okay?”
“What did you do Sam?” He wanted to yell, to scream, to punch his brother in the face but he couldn’t get enough air in his lungs and his body seemed frozen in shock.
He tilted his head to the side, confusion evident. “She took you from me. I told you I was going to make her pay for that.”
“She was the last seal Sam!”
Why wasn’t it raining fire yet? Was it possible that was simply a myth? And where was Cas and Anna and all the other angels? Had they retreated back to Heaven and left mankind to deal alone with Dean’s fuck up?
Sam sigh was put upon, “Well that complicates things.”
“What?” He shook his head, trying to make sense of the words. “What the hell Sam?”
He never learned had a chance to learn what his brother meant because Ruby chose that moment to throw herself at him.
“I’ve had all the shit I’m going to take from you!” She snarled just before his back hit the floor hard.
Stars burst behind his eyes as soon as his head hit the ground and Sam yelling for Ruby to get off of him rattled around in his head like a sonic boom. He tried to groan but the sound was cut off by her wrapping her hands around his throat.
“You’re not worthy of Sam!”
Dean couldn’t see straight, darkness slowly edging into his vision but he could still feel. Feel the hilt of her demon killing knife warm in his hand.
She thought she had had enough of him? He had had more than enough of her even before he had gone to hell and that had been before she had so completely corrupted his brother.
Everything happened in a blur of the eye. Just as he bucked up to unseat her and brought the knife up to bury it in her throat, Sam bowled into her. When it was all said and done, it was Sam that lay dead, sprawled across Dean’s thighs, the knife sticking out of chest.
No! No, no, no, no!
He hadn’t meant, he had been going for Ruby. What the hell had Sam been thinking? She deserved to die, she was the reason that Sam was wrong.
“What did you do?”
To Dean it was like Ruby was speaking to him from far away. He couldn’t tell if she was yelling or whispering.
Remotely he could feel himself shaking and his body was quickly going cold, but none of that mattered anymore.
He had killed Sam, the one thing that he had never meant to do, not even when his father’s warning had still been fresh in his ear.
He let his eyes slide closed and hoped that it would be enough for Ruby to take advantage of. Let her kill him; it wasn’t like he cared anymore. He had failed at everything, protecting Sam, bringing him back from the darkness, the apocalypse, everything.
Everything inside himself was chaos, he could feel his heart tearing it’s self apart as images of his past with Sam overlapping with Angels and Demons and the figure of a young dark haired man with knowing eyes that he inherently knew was God.
And then suddenly it was like the last piece of the puzzle slid into place. All at once he understood why he always felt abandoned when he was on his own. Why family was the most important thing to him. Why he had worked so hard to be the perfect son and make his father proud.
Because his true father had cast him aside eons ago, replaced in his heart by a creation that was so much less than he and his younger siblings were.
Lilith hadn’t been the last seal, although he truly believed she had believed it. The first wife of Adam, tossed aside because she had been an equal and refused to bow to her husband. The first woman, the first to fall because of pride, that last seal, it would almost make sense.
Except he could remember the words whispered in his ear, the ultimate riddle, wrapped in a facade, wrapped in the first murder.
The last seal was the recreation of Cain and Abel.
Dean opened his eyes in time to see Ruby tear the knife from Sam’s chest and swing it towards him. All he had to do was shift his gaze and she flew across the room. He watched as she pulled herself up to her knees and stared at him.
“How?” She muttered low.
He could feel his face stretching into a grin.
“Ever wonder why no one in hell ever saw the Light Bringer?” He asked softly and found amusement in the confusion he could perceive in her black eyes. “Lucifer’s only crime was to question why a lesser creation was held above him and his siblings.” He shrugged ruefully, “Well that and trying to take Heaven from the Father. But when all those that followed him were cast into the pit, God had a much crueller punishment in mind for his first child. All Lucifer, all I, wanted was the love of my Father and my family near me and He made sure I had neither. My essence was cursed to walk the earth, memory of who I was trapped in a corner of my mind that I couldn’t access and my mortal family forever leaving me behind.”
Dean shifted until he could lay Sam down on the ground and ran his fingers gently down his cooling cheek before he glanced back at the demon. “But Sam came back when I needed him and then took it upon himself to try to avenge my soul being dragged into hell. He showed me the love that I had craved for so very, very long.”
He glanced down at his brother’s still body, “And now I can ensure that I never lose that love.”
Slowly he leaned forward, rested the palm of one hand against the wound in his brother’s chest and pressed his lips to his brother’s. “Forever mine.”
Dean didn’t need a crossroads demon to make a deal, not anymore.
Sam gasped against his lips and Dean pulled away to smile down at him.
“You can still call me that.”
Sam blinked and opened and closed his mouth a couple times before finally settling on, “How?”
“You know Ruby,” he started conversationally as he glanced over at her. “As a demon you’re a disgrace and you covet what’s mine.”
He pictured her body being engulfed in flames and her essence being torn apart. Almost instantly it happened, her scream of pain cut off almost before it began.
“Jesus Christ Dean!” Sam rolled over and pushed up to his knees. “What the hell?”
He laughed, carefree for the first time in eons. “Let me tell you a story about seals, an essence hidden and Cain and Abel, little brother.” He wrapped his fingers in the soft cotton of Sam’s over-shirt and pulled until they were chest to chest. “But first.” He pressed his lips against his brother’s, the memory of the guilt he had felt only scant hours before, laughable. “You don’t leave me again.”
Sam raised an eyebrow, confusion still evident but it was overshadowed by happiness. “Never.”
“Wanna raise a little Hell?”
Dean got to his feet and outstretched his hand to pull Sam to his.
“I thought you had a story to tell.”
He slung an arm over his brother’s shoulders and started to guide them from the motel room. “And I’ll tell it but I’m good at multitasking and we need to see if any of His army is still stupid enough to be roaming my kingdom.”
Sam draped an arm around his waist, “Whose army?”
Dean turned in time to see Sam’s eyes fade to gold. “Hell yeah.”